people.

I have felt rather uninspired lately. My thoughts all a mess, totally out of sorts for me. Wednesday was a turning point for me. I don't know if it was a big one, but I'm thinking just a smidge clearer. Enough to let my thoughts out...

There is a small group that meets at my families house every Wednesday night. We have been meeting for a little over a year, studying 1 Peter. We actually made it through 1 Peter at our one year mark and just started 2 Peter. We dive in deep and pull everything that we can apart, and wrestle with what it means and how it applies to our lives. Yes the study has been amazing. But what I have taken for granted was the people.

We are a very random group of people, the youngest being 19ish and the the oldest probably 60ish. We have very little in common, but the fact that we all want to know God better and let His Word transform our lives. But that is enough for us to keep meeting and enjoy each others company.

I don't know what hit me the other night in the middle of study, but I was sent into a giggle fit. I laughed hard and was full of sass. Which I don't always show this side of me when we meet. (In fact several comments were made with people wanting to know if I was ok.) I can't even explained what happened, but as we sat there and discussed some amazing verses I realized that each of us come with a purpose and make up this small body in our living room. I felt like I had a purpose to be there the other night. My guard had been let down and I was able to be me. Silly, sassy, and serious. Why did I hold back so long?

It hit me yesterday how important it is to have people in your life that you can be yourself around. I don't want to have my guard up all the time. What was or am I afraid of to guard myself the way have been? What are you afraid of to keep your guard up the way you do? What makes you/me hold back? Who makes you/me put our guard up?

I could go so many places trying to answers those questions, but what I'm finding more important, is just letting loose. I want to be me. And I want you to be you. No masks. Just people being real. I love that I have those relationships where I can laugh and be silly or be vulnerable with. It makes me more of a person to have those people in my life...if that makes sense. I love that I have people in my life that push me to be more than I thought I could be or to step out of my comfort zone. I love that there are people in my life that ask me the hard questions or even better really listen to my answers. I love that I have a cheer squad, people standing behind me cheering me all the way, even when I fall. I love that I have people in my life that I know have my back covered no matter what. I know I could call them for anything and they would be there. I love and I'm thankful beyond words, that I have people in my life like this, because it inspires me to take action and be that for them.